Autumn

Autumn

Sunday, January 26, 2014

Ramblings on Food

Our old cat is sound asleep in the wife's chair. She's old, I'd guess her age, since we really don't know for sure, at about twelve. Her name is Patches, named thus by the wife for the white spots on her front legs.

We both love our old cat. She has made a fine lap warmer over the years, but here's the thing - the wife believes I accepted this bundle of fur into our home as a pet - nope. An explanation, and confession is required.

As a survivalist I look upon her as a potential meal, if a tough chew, when and if necessary. Otherwise why keep critters about the house. They're expensive. Our old cat only eats certain canned food and the stuff isn't cheap. I'm sure my good friend, Harry understands. He has all those ferrets, cats and dogs underfoot for a reason don't 'ya know. He may balk and give long explanations about companionship and protection, but I know he has long range plans for his oven and griddle when desperate times arrive.

Dog makes for a fine meal. Bit greasy, but tasty none the less. Just an FYI.

Like I said, our cat is old. I've tried to keep her weight stabilized at around ten or so pounds which should yield a dressed out parcel of six or so pounds of fresh meat when the poop hits the fan and my grill is hot and oiled for the feline bar-b-que. So, here's my quandary...should I expedite the field dressing, grill, then search for a fresher cut of cat. You decide.

Kittens are cheaper by the dozen...

*****

Pray tell what do you folks do with beet tops, greens? Yesterday I did a wee bit of shopping and came home with a two bundles of beets. My friend Duke's mother was nice enough to share her beet recipe with me and I'd like to give it a try today. Thing is those beet tops look awful tasty. Never in my life have I utilized beet greens. Oh, and a lamb roast....give those over too.

So, help me out here and I'll reciprocate with my house cat recipe.

*****

My mind is locked firmly on food this morning...perhaps I should shut this computer down and eat breakfast. I just spotted the neighbors poodle, and poodle, I understand, makes for a fine quiche.


Although I recommend a good twenty-four hour salt water soak prior to preparation.

Trust me on this.

Stephen

38 comments:

  1. dear me - sound riled up and pull of p*ss and vinegar today sweet one! for the beat greens - some people chop off the stalks but to me and jam the stalks are the best part. heat up some butter in a pan, toss the greens in, let them wilt for as little or as long as you like, salt and pepper and you'll be singing beet green praises for the rest of your life - they are deeeelishous! kind of like spinach but better! you can also eat them raw in salad or throw them in soups and stews!

    you can keep the cat and dog recipes to yourself!!! bahahahah!

    i just finished catching up on your older posts. i am so happy for what happened on christmas eve. so happy. i just know that she'll soon be back in your lives regularly.

    much love to you, and all of yours! your friend,
    kymber

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    1. Are you sure you don't want my recipe for cat stew...? Dog, I cook slowly over a campfire...just stick the pieces on a stick and char. Salt lightly. Thanks, Sweet kymber, I hope they return to our lives very soon.

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  2. You do realize of course . . . that your cat . . . looks at you exactly the same way . . . .

    Nice to have you writing again.

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    1. Indeed she does but I own a gun....thanks, Bubba, nice to be back.

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  3. My cat is in hiding since I read your post aloud this morning. And my Yorkies have retired to their kennel and shut the door. I don't know why...

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    1. Critters are strange, aren't they...but then again they do know their place in the grand scheme of things. Thanks, Vicki.

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  4. Have you seen the size of a Maine Coon cat? I think you should super size your house cat. Personally, since I'm allergic and cats are nasty creatures, I refuse to have a cat. We have a dog, though. But, I think he'd eat me before I could eat him. He's a big, mean guy.

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  5. No, Mermaid, I've never had the pleasure of seeing a live Maine Coon cat, other than in pictures. Never say never when it comes to big mean dogs....of course my piece was in jest but dog is a delicacy in many parts of the world. When you're down to your last grasshopper and over boiled tree bark the mutt will appear in your dreams as sirloin.

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  6. Ummhmmm, right, YOU'RE going to eat Sweet Wife's pet!! Me thinks not!
    I have 3 of the furry creatures...farm cats they be, but they like to cuddle so think I would keep them as foot warmers. Have a rescue hound, too, but would have to marinate her a week before she would be chewable!

    Kymber is right about the beet greens. They are good, tho I've just had them cooked like spinach. My dear Mother would put a little vinegar on them when cooked, but I like them better plain.

    Take care...blessings!

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    1. Yep, until I'm starving...

      I'll use pepper vinegar this evening. As I type they simmer. Blessings to you too, Dear Lady. And, thanks.

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  7. Replies
    1. Exactly....interesting art. Thanks.

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  8. My ferrets are my companions up here. I'd never eat them! But I might eat some person who was just passing by if things got bad enough. I mean, somehow it doesn't seem as bad as eating the ferrets. Or the dog. Or the cat.........

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    1. Ughuh, I hear 'ya....

      Think dusted in salt, pepper and flour. Then into hot bacon grease. Never tried long pork....but I understand the loin is tasty. Thanks, my friend.

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  9. OH you bad, bad boy!
    Eiafinfo said it best :-D

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    Replies
    1. Chuckle....thanks, Sweet Cathy. Look forward to tomorrow's pictures.

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  10. Sweet Wife was not pleased with your squirrel eradication program. What will be her reaction to pets as a food source?

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  11. Cats are fair game, but dogs are family. I have relatives I would eat before my dog.

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    Replies
    1. I do understand, my friend. I once had a dog. I didn't eat it.

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  12. Definitely gotta keep you away from my chickens......
    Beet tops - saute them in butter, diced fresh garlic clove and a bit of onion. Yummy!

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    Replies
    1. Mom, I used a version of your method but with bacon grease, a bit of vinegar, a touch of water, garlic, onion, red pepper flakes....so good. Now, chicken - kinda boring after a good meal of cat.

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  13. For older pets, you might want to consider a braise (like a Stew). I'd think that cat would make a fine saurbrauten.

    Kittens, though, are perfect for a hot grill, with sea salt, garlic, and rosemary ...

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    1. Oh, Bubba, I know braise and of course you are so correct...stringy lean alley cat requires a slow burn. Hadn't though of sea salt but have used rosemary on kitten, and harbor seal pups. Thanks, my friend.

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  14. Ya Harry is a push over he won't ever eat the animals from around the petting zoo/pet retirement home.

    The wife don;t know it but I second secret names for all these cats we keep accumulating. There's Lunchmeat, crockpot, fishbait, jerkystrips, etc. etc. etc.

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  15. I read somewhere in a SHTF situation that all stray cats need to be destroyed immediately ( guess if you're hungry...eat them) cats that are roaming and hungry will get rid of all the small animals that we will need for our survival. Cat is probably good if you know how to prepare it. Many Chinese restaurants have been known to serve it in place of chicken! We only hear about it when they get caught!

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  16. I love those beets, might get a mess this week.

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    1. I have leftovers but you can't have 'em....tell your mother her sauce was great. Thanks, my friend.

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  17. Beet greens are great if you cook 'em like you're making a wilted spinach salad, with bacon and some dried cherries or cranberries with a nice vinaigrette.

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    1. Thanks, I will give it a try...I like the dried cranberry idea.

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  18. Oh my! What a waste has been going on! Saute some garlic and onions and toss those beet tops in! A little salt and pepper an voila! Just don't be shocked the next time you pee...

    Radish greens can be sauteed as well.

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    1. I now realize that and what a shame. Still kicking my butt over all the wasted chow. Thanks, my friend.

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  19. I have a cat in the house. We guess her age at 13. She is precisely the sort of feline that gives cats a bad name. Post your mailing address and when she goes toes up I'll freeze her and ship her your way. Might make a passable stew or soup but I won't eat her. She'd find some way to choke me to death.

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    1. I'll take her, Knucklehead. Meat is meat and I'm not all that particular. Thanks, Bubba.

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  20. beet leaf nelesniky ukrainian canadian recipe.
    beet leaves, heavy cream, dill weed, yeast dough.take small bits of dough and roll into leaf.
    place in casserole as you would for stuffed grape leaves. dill weed between each layer.
    cover with cream. let it settle to lake sure there is enough.
    bake them with lid on.

    i don't know if lid is cocked nor do i know proper temperature.
    however, i have been in on the eating. they are scrumptious!!
    feeds a family to fullness if you are a [poor farmer with a cream giving cow.
    the cream there is so thick a spoon stands up in it.
    we lived in winterpeg for about a year. this is one of many fabulous foods. you need stodgy food in that climate, of which we are getting a taste here now.
    and if you go to kalekas restaurant on north main street they have the best french fries. you have to restrain them from putting gravy on the fries--and don't let them butter your hot dogs! they think ketchup and mustard are very strange accompaniments on hot dogs, but perhaps their horizons have widened in over 35 years.
    deb h

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    1. Deborah, thank you so very much for the nice recipe and remembrance. One of the nicest comments I've received in months. If I ever find myself back in Winnipeg I will find Kalekas and try their fries. Bless you, and again, thanks.

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