I Try To Please

Today I was firmly told by a nice older fella I needed to get off my backside and post. I explained I was not in the mood.  Matter of fact I'm kinda ticked off...because -

Our home air unit is on the fritz and I'm sure repairs will cost us a pretty penny and the friggin unit isn't even eight years old. My Sweet Wife has strange worrisome back pains which will haunt me until we get a doctor's report. Our yard is a mess and when I have a rare afternoon to attend it the weather turns against me. My reading list is a mile long and continues to grow. I haven't time for my hobbies, which is dead skunk drag my butt in the mud kick a democrat in the knee awful.

So, here I sit with sore feet with my cell at a constant scream. Just spent the last fifteen minutes answering text messages. I'm about to throw this Blackberry across the room. There, see, two more beeps...

Oh, before I forget...to my constant reader in Everett, Washington - thanks. I appreciate it.

At the request of my lovely wife we went to the movies...you know, the kind of movie where other people sit in the same darkness with you and use their cell phones as flashlights, yep that kind. The title of this movie was 'God's Not Dead.' She loved it. I enjoyed the fact she loved it. I highly recommend it..on DVD. Truthfully it was a pretty good movie.

Rambling...this cell is about to drive me nuts. Just checked and it's Senior - he can wait.

Peace...it's all I ask. Beep....

Stephen

   

Duh...

We must shop, tonight.

She needs a new cell phone. Her Blackberry is old and gave her fits when she was on her road trip. Fine with me but I hate retail establishments. They have little boys with ponytails that float about in their loafers and girls with pink eyeglasses when engaged in conversation use 'like' as apostrophes.

As delicate as I am if I survive the experience without psychological damage it'll be a miracle.

I wonder if they barter as I have several nice squirrel hides.

Stephen

The Addiction

An addict, as defined by Webster, is one who has a confirmed habit.

Today a good friend came in and we chatted for a while, he more than me. Asked about his family. Said they were fine, healthy. Then he said he had a problem with his youngest daughter. I'll call her Missy.

Went on to explain, Missy, liked to text. I said, so what. Then he pulled out his phone bill. It's the current months charges. My friend and his wife both had about three hundred minutes of text usage. Missy had nineteen thousand minutes. That's 19,000 minutes.

Do the math. She's twelve years old.

I understand she takes a shower on occasion.

He asked what he should do. They've tried everything. I said, first throw the phone in the trash. Second, buy her a few books and then a rifle.

It wouldn't work. She's an addict.

Stephen